Again, I heard that familiar voice say “My child, let go.”
Drop the bag. I was holding on to it tightly the first time I heard God clearly say let go. God then was telling me in a dream to drop my bag containing syringes. But it was not just about my career path, it was also about letting go of my pride, of my old self. It was also His way of saying You have to surrender yourself to Me. Submission was one of God’s pre-requisites for me to take the course of Mission.
’23 Then he [Jesus] said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.” ‘-Luke 9:23
“17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” -2 Corinthians 5:17
Another dream ended with the scenario wherein I did not say a word nor act in opposition to someone walking away, but I knew that I just had to let go. It was also a hint of a struggle that I was about to face, though I did not fully grasp its complexity until the time that it had to happen. God taught me the lesson of waiting upon Him- depending and focusing on Him above all as my First Love and leaving in His hands the right timing for everything.
“5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways submit to him,and he will make your paths straight.” -Proverbs 3:5-6
Last month, again, He said that specific instruction. I thought to myself “It has only been months. Is it really time?” The ministries have always been from, by, of, and for God. The challenge for me was to decrease while allowing others to increase. If I were to leave, I should allow God to prepare His people for my absence. God has to increase; I have to decrease.
“29 The bride belongs to the bridegroom. The friend who attends the bridegroom waits and listens for him, and is full of joy when he hears the bridegroom’s voice. That joy is mine, and it is now complete. 30 He [Jesus] must become greater; I must become less.” – John 3: 29-30
Just about two weeks ago, while praying, a picture of a fountain flashed, and it was as if the droplets of water splashed towards me that moment, even though the fountain I had in mind was at a distance. That instance I felt touched, important, and refreshed. God wanted the love to abound so others may feel it-even those people not close to you, people you do not know, people you might never get the chance to know intimately, and people literally far from you -long to be gracious even to that person you have not seen or talked for quite some time.
“12 May the Lord make your love increase and overflow for each other and for everyone else, just as ours does for you.” – 1 Thessalonians 3:12
God wanted His love to overflow abundantly without any hindrance. In response, I said “I do not know how.” I just knew He said, just trust Me like before – Keep that faith in Me, have your hopes high, and love. It is with the latter word that a certain phrase spoke to my heart –forgive and forget.
“4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”- 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7
When a friend, during one of our conversations regarding this matter, said “release it,” it spoke to my heart as “My child, let go.” From then I felt the heavy shackles lost its grip on me, slowly paving way for love to abound unhindered. Letting go is recognizing that only God can deeply search our hearts and know our thoughts. Letting go for me also meant that I may not exactly understand the pain, the circumstances which are painful and the choices that led to pain, but I will trust and obey.
Then I was reminded by God about the story of Jesus Walking on the Water ( Matthew 13: 22-36).
To my heart, Jesus spoke: When I asked you to step out of your boat and walk with Me on the water, you did not understand how to do it but you took the privilege to walk with Me. Like Peter, you doubted. You doubted yourself often, but you placed your confidence in Me.
In a devotion I wrote entitled “Out of the Boat,” I used the story to talk about responding to the call of God, even if it requires stepping out of our boats, letting go of our comfort zones, familiar places and things we used to do with the people we used to be around with. When we respond to God’s call, we will experience how it is to walk by faith in obedience, with eyes focused on Jesus. God will not leave us no matter how deep and harsh the ocean of doubt and how strong the winds can get.
Letting go is like the stars at night. They shine brightly because darkness surrounds them. They have been always up there but they are more beautiful and much appreciated when they sparkle and give light to a dark blanket. When you know that a certain part of your life is getting blurry or dim, perhaps there are things that you needed to let go of, perhaps it is time to give off your light. By God’s leading, shine and be expended.
Letting go is like the stars and the possibilities. They are too numerous to count and understand. But the good news is we do not have to count all the stars to experience their beauty and we do not have to know all the possibilities ahead of us to take the first step of walking in obedience to God. We may be required to let go more than once, and too often it would be painful, but as long as we have God and we continue to pursue an intimate walk with Him, we will go through the process of stepping out of the boat wonderfully –we need not to count how many times should we have to do it or know everything that lies ahead.
A journey is more amazing when we give up something for the Lord, allowing Him to give us with everything that we need and nothing but the best. By the grace of God, we can leave our boats and walk with Jesus on the water. By the power of the Holy Spirit, we can persevere in obedience.
My God, have Your way.
By Your grace, I am letting go.
♥ Pol /J.P.T. Ventura
9 But he [Christ] said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
-2 Corinthians 12: 9